Healing emerges as Yobe families of the missing persons share their stories
By Ahmed Isah
When fifty families walked into the Damaturu hall on a quiet Tuesday morning, many carried more than faded photographs and unanswered questions. They brought years of fear, grief, and the silent ache of not knowing. For some, it was the first time in a long while that they were surrounded by people who understood that kind of pain without explanation.
The Fourth International Conference for Families of Missing Persons, organised by the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC) and the Nigerian Red Cross Society, became a rare space for healing. The gathering, held from Nov. 11 to 13, drew families from communities across Yobe—families who had lived with the uncertainty of separation, some for more than a decade.
ICRC Head of Sub-delegation in Damaturu, Mr Rashid Hasan, welcomed the families with words meant to soften the edges of their sorrow. He reminded them that their experiences were part of a larger global narrative—one in which thousands of people across continents search daily for missing relatives.
Hasan said the conference aimed to give voice to families whose stories often remain within the walls of their homes. “We try our best to be with you and take from you what you have learnt through your journey, which is not easy,” he said. His tone carried both empathy and urgency.
Behind every seat in the hall was a story of interruption: children who left for school and never returned, husbands whose traces vanished during conflict, brothers taken by insurgents, and relatives separated by sudden displacement.
For many participants, the conference offered something they had long been denied—space to speak without hesitation or judgement.
Mr Ishaku Luka, the Protection of Family Links Team Leader in Yobe, said families were selected from more than 2,400 open tracing cases in the state. He described the gathering as a place where stories could finally be shared, heard, and met with compassion.
“The idea is for them to understand that they are not walking this journey alone,” he said. “Separation happens everywhere. People are living through similar pain across the world.”
Luka said the sessions, led by experts and fellow family members, focused on healing, mental resilience, and building personal strength. Several participants, he added, showed visible emotional transformation—from tense faces at the start to relieved smiles by the final day.
Among the participants was Mallam Ali Idriss from Gujba. Soft-spoken and thoughtful, he admitted that the experience altered his understanding of loss.
“Before, I thought missing persons were only in Borno, Yobe, and Adamawa,” he said. “But here, I realised it is a worldwide issue. Sharing our difficulties gave me relief.”
For Mallam Ali, the conference created a bridge—linking him to others who understood the lonely nights and the lingering fear that often come with not knowing the fate of a loved one.
Malama Nana Abdullahi, a mother from Damaturu, has searched for two missing family members for more than ten years. Her life, she said, has been shaped by daily uncertainty—raising children alone, managing financial hardship, and living with the constant hope that one day a door might open with news.
For the first time, she said she found comfort in a room where every face echoed some version of her story.
“I realised my pain is not mine alone,” she said, her voice cracking with emotion. “Listening to other mothers gave me courage. It helped me breathe again.”
She described the experience sharing and counselling sessions as “a turning point,” helping her release emotions she had buried for years. “I now know that healing is part of this journey,” she added.
ICRC officials say the organisation continues to trace missing persons and restore family links. Luka explained that all services offered by the ICRC and the Nigerian Red Cross are free—a precaution repeated often because of impostors claiming otherwise.
He explained that families could report missing relatives directly at the Damaturu office or through Red Cross volunteers across communities.
As the conference ended, many families lingered, reluctant to leave a space that had offered rare warmth. They exchanged phone numbers, embraced, and promised to support one another beyond the walls of the event.
The pain of losing someone was not erased. But for the first time, many walked away knowing their grief was seen, their stories mattered, and their hope had companions.
For families living in the shadow of uncertainty, this gathering in Damaturu provided something invaluable: not answers, but the strength to keep searching, keep healing, and keep believing that closure—whatever form it may take—remains possible.
